Dan untuk ke sekian kalinya...

Every time we check our inbox, most people will go through the list of subjects before clicking to open and read the content of the email. We will be very happy looking at the senders name if it was a long lost old friend. We can be excited if we are expecting an email saying that we have won the bidding on ebay. Much more delightful if we got new photos of families and friends. The incoming spams and junk mails sometimes unavoidable. However, it can be easily deleted or labeled as 'spam' so that next time it will go straight into 'Spam' folder. However, there are sometimes where we don't really like the emails, but we read it anyway. So, senders and subjects are the main factors that determine whether one will open or delete an email.



BILA NAK BALIK?

Having people around me who are using PCs, I received emails almost everyday. One disconcerting 'heading' or sometimes 'body' of the emails are sentences sound like or similar to these, "Bila nak balik?" or "Bila habis?" or "Bila nak balik Malaysia?" or even worse "Tak nak balik Malaysia ke?" or in English literally means "When are you coming back to Malaysia?". Dan untuk ke sekian kalinya, I received the same questions just a couple of days ago, totally spoiled the good mood I was having.

There are two interpretations or maksud tersirat that I can think of upon receiving these messages. You can see the difference of tone in these two categories:

First:
a. Why are you so slow? Three years already passed and you still not finish yet? Are you stupid?
b. What are you doing there? Studying or enjoying your time?
c. Balik la cepat! Kerja banyak ni, tunggu hang balik aje.

Second:
a. Miss you a lot, long time no see.
b. Lama tak lepak2, borak2, makan2 sama-sama.
c. They are just being polite, tanya khabar.

Well you might say I am paranoid, but I happened to know some people who agreed with me. Maybe because being in an 'insecure' position full of pressure makes us feel like that, but duh! I am doing PhD, and being philosophical have made you always thinking beyond the literal meanings. Furthermore, involved in qualitative study allows me to theoretically presume the outcomes or impacts of a certain things that can't be measured statistically. Argh! What have I done to my brain?!

Everybody have the ability to interpret the information they have received based on their own capacity and limited knowledge. But not everyone will come to the same conclusion. To know more, you have to learn, experience and study yourself. To all my friends yang dah di hujung-hujung jalan, keep up your hard work! For those who are just at the beginning, good luck and all the best. For people who are planning to get yourself into the 'tunnel', may Allah guide you and get the right one.

Keep on asking, at least it reminds me of how much I have been missed and loved back home...